Did you know these?

*in E! Voice* Here are the 10 things you did not know about me…Sit (stand) back, relax & read….

1. I “auto-weaned” myself when I was 6 months old. Yes, I’m bad ass like that. I was tired of the breast secretion (ewwww) & stopped taking it. For this reason, I was transferred to my grandma in the village where I spent 18 months. Can y’all beat that?

2. I used to have a terrible case of vitamin D deficiency- rickets. Yes! Bow leg. Sources said my walking was so clumsy because of this condition that I always tripped whenever I walked.

Well, God took control. After a series of early morning sun & series of prayers (bet they thought I was disabled), my legs straightened out. The bow leg transformed into a nicely avocado (or apple?)-shaped hips…blessing in disguise…pray pray pray Praiseee tha Lorrrrrd *catwalks away swinging hips*

3. I used to be a very heavy ebinna. I could eat anything. It got so bad my mum bought sliced bread for the remaining of the family & would give me money to go & buy my “agege bread” because that was the only thing that filled me.

I used to win food competitions (you know all those “who can drink Pepsi fastest?” competitions) at every birthday party.I shat (past tense of shit) accordingly. Homegirl had a very protruding tummy, add that to my bow leg & you get AWESOME *sprays cough syrup*

I learnt very early in life the trick of spitting inside food so my brother & cousins wouldn’t eat out of it. People used to throw their remaining eba at me & I never achieved satiety.
People, I’m embarassed…I should stop now *wipes tears of joy*

4. When I was 7 years old, I woke up one morning to find my eyelids glued together. In my mind, I was happy that meant more Pronto (the sicker you were, the more Pronto you got), not knowing my eyes were bad. Anyway, I used one freakingly ugly glasses from primary 3 to J. S. S. 3.

The glasses were uglier than Tinubu’s & so thick. I’m still looking for a perfect time when I will sit my parents down and ask them just 4 words “why those glasses folks?”. *sigh*

5. I am a Mathematics guru. I just found (find) it easy. I represented my school & state in some competitions & I thrashed all thrashable asses. *cleans shades* I loved (love) Mathematics so much that I told my dad I wanted to study pure & applied maths in school. My dad said after I finish my 1st degree, I would. Yes, I know he lied to me. I guess its cus he loves me. 😦

6. I am a medical student. Do you need more info? Well, I study medicine & surgery & I have seen cadavers & touched them before. You can’t die if you see blood, its a lie!!!!

7. I love being alone. People find this hard to believe because I’m usually a chatty & bubbly person. Give me electricity, some movies and my blackberry with food and water, I could stay indoors for days. I’m cool like that. *locks door*

8. I’m a realistic feminist. I believe women shouldn’t take shit & all but we shouldn’t deflect too much from reality too. NO!!!! to all sorts of violence. Respect your husband and take care of your child(ren).

I’m attracted to intelligent people, not those people that talk football o. God knows how many crushes I’ve had on twitter just cus they are intelligent, females inclusive. I AM STRAIGHT!!!!!!! I have a special hatred for the over-sabi/ too know attitude.

9. I am not a group/ clique person. God knows I have tried it so much but they just don’t work for me. Somehow, I just get lost and don’t fit in. I’m a one-friend person and once I can trust you with my secrets, we are safe.

I am a good friend. People say this a lot.*queues infront of Zenith bank to withdraw money*. I can give my friends anything, except my new crush ofcourse 😉

10. I like tall guys. I’m sorry if you are short. *side eye at some people* I’m not a racist or anything but Y U NO CHOP ENOUGH BEANS???? I just feel like I’m auto-licensed to knock you if you are shorter than me (I’m 5’7.5″). A guy should be atleast 5’10” *catches & chews bullets*

I have a friend that loves you guys sha…call her on 0800-IDONTEXIST. :d

*in E! Voice*…and that’s that about our star for today.


10 Responses to “Did you know these?”
  1. rhaiharnah says:

    Star noni *yimu*.. I see a GEEK jare..oju igo to ni bowleg totun mo iwe.. Ah! No friends too?? Imtroverted extrovert?? GEEK gidi

  2. cassbaba noni says:

    Oya start a diary like that boy in Diary of a Wimpy Kid. I’m sure you are joking with this post tho?

  3. pelumi says:

    Deola hates me cuz Am short*wailing*…..*consoling self*be strong man,dry ur tears..jst ensure u marry a tall gal so ur children wil av a shot @ bin tall n they wuldnt be humiliated like dis by deola’s children*
    N:B..mak sure ur children eat lotta beans too atleast twice a day 24/7 till they r 18yrs old

    • adeolaaa says:

      Hahaha! U joker!!! 5’4″ is not short now, some people are dwarfs *looks other way* feed ur children beans coated with growth enzymes *dont ask me*

  4. terdoh says:

    I admire those of you who can actually post facts about themselves. If I did it, I would probably get hate mail. Good one Deola.

  5. Luciano says:

    IN TE RES THINGGGG…….. bow legged? oh my! just imagine if u were still like that? we wii see if u wii still have mouth….lol

  6. Kemmiiii says:

    Lol! I like this! And Rhihanas comment.
    You are a med student where?

  7. Frankices says:

    Wait. WHAT HIPS??! *laffs out LOUD(wide mouth n all), pointing*

    Rolling at “racist”. smh.

    P.S. Yes I know its been about a year n I’m just commenting. Deal with it. *kisses*

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